the weekend

Why does the weekend have to go by so very fast? My husband and I took the boys, my son and his friend to see Shrek yesterday afternoon. They boys loved wearing the 3D glasses and kept pointing at the screen several times saying TV??? They loved the popcorn!!

Then we came home and the boys played in the sprinkler while the hubby grilled.

Lil Boy was having a hard time listening and remembering not to run in the house. Nothing major --just a little more than what he had been doing.

Lil Man was pretty much the same way but was whining more than he has been.

The boys did not have a visit with their parents and older brothers last week. Instead they have a 1 1/2 hour visitation tomorrow afternoon. I am glad for them that they get to have this visit and see their family and then there is the other side of me. The side that hates so badly to see these babies scream and cry for their family. And I do mean scream.

The past couple of days I have been feeling a little edgy and as though there was something weighing on me. I just could not put my finger on what it was for nothing. I just could not figure it out.

Then, today at lunch it hit me. My niece that we tried to adopt was what was wrong.....
I realized this when we sang a song at church today that includes different versus of Amazing Grace -I had taught her to sing this song when she was here with us and it still holds a special place in my heart just for her. I really love the song Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone). Well, today for some reason the part that says something like:

my chains are gone
I've been set free

Suddenly I felt the heaviness get even heavier. I realized right then that this is the same heaviness I have been feeling the last couple of days.....it is a heaviness relating to my niece. One of the things we noticed most about her when she was here with us was that she was finally about to be "free" to be a little 3 year old, "free" to be happy, "free" to be herself. I feel as though her chains are not gone and she cannot be set free.....

I know this is God's way of telling me to lift her up in prayer right now. I am telling you I have such a connection with this little girl that even to me sometimes it is unbelievable. I started to call her today, even though they rarely answer the phone and let us talk to her. But I didn't. It is not time for me to call yet. It is time for me to PRAY. God love her sweet, sweet heart and I pray she feels my love from thousands of miles away.....I miss her so much.