We did not have a family visitation last week and instead had a 1 1/2 hour visit yesterday. The parents arrived and signed in 15 minutes late so the boys case worker cut the visit to just a little over one hour.
The older boys arrived shortly after we did. All four brothers were so happy to see each other. The nine year old came straight to me and gave me a hug. I then hugged the ten year old. We all visited for a couple of minutes since the case worker had not arrived yet. It was nice to visit with all four of them together. Then, off they all four went with the case worker for the visit. As they were walking off something very different happened. Lil Boy looked back at my husband and I and was very hesitant....as if he was trying to make up his mind if he wanted to go or not. As if he was debating on what to do. I looked at him and told him it was okay to go and Pops and I would be back to get him. He said okay and waved as he walked off with his three brothers.
Apparently the parents brought the boys happy meals. I am not sure how many they brought but the case worker gave my husband one bag with two chicken nugget containers and fries. We brought it home but did not let the boys finish eating it......well because the parents are so incredibly filthy that we didn't want them eating anything else that the parents had touched.
Seriously, the parents are that filthy. I guess it may sound kinda far fetched that we did not let the boys eat the rest of the happy meal but that is the decision that my husband and I made and both agreed on.
I did because sadly aggravated....really I wasn't aggravated....I was aggravated in a sad way. Sad that the boys love their family so much -especially their momma and brothers and these parents can't even take a flipping bath. Heck, they can't even wash their hands and face before they come where???? HELLO, TO THE C*P*S OFFICE!!! They were just as filthy the first time in court. It makes me sad for Lil Boy and Lil Man.....
After the visit, Lil Boy was very upset, screaming and crying which is the same behavior for him. However, Lil Man was fine. He was talking and really not paying attention to Lil Boy crying. He was fine all the way home. Each time when we get home we have to take baths immediately ---again the parents are this filthy. The boys start getting undressed and then it hit Lil Man. He just sank to the floor and began screaming and crying.
Both boys cried throughout their baths and finally settled down after we got out. For the next two hours they were both so wired. I kept telling them to settle down and finally I had to use my serious voice and told them they were going to time out if they did not settle down.
On our way to daycare school (that is what we call it) we sing our abc's and 123's. This morning I started singing the abc's and Lil Boy told me "don't talk to me". I pulled the car over, got out my serious voice, and explained to him we do not talk like that. We must use our good manners and will not say that again.
Thank goodness they both had a good day according to the daycare school:)
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i haven't really had to deal with the whole bad behavior after visits thing. S is just now getting old enough to do stuff like that and she doesn't really take it out on me, she takes it out on her mom at the end of her visits.
ReplyDeletethere was once visit early on, where savannah clung to me crying and didn't want to go to her mom. that was hard. it is hard to look at their faces and say it's ok when all you want to do is get them out of there.
it is so sad, she had just gotten used to the weekend visits and was doing good with them and now that they got taken away (which is a very good thing) she is having a hard time re-adjusting to not seeing her mom much anymore. some days it doesn't bother her at all, but yesterday when she was overly tired so did get sad about it for a minute which broke my heart. I know she loves them, I wish they would be decent people.
Leah,
ReplyDeleteIt is just so sad ----the things these innocent babies and children are going through at the hands of parents that seem just not to care at all.
Poor S, it is just so hard for them to understand.....